Interests/Passion Vs. Occupation

Haha, nothing to do now in sch. Wah piang wait for 6 hrs of break leh.. Can u imagine it? In the end i end up doing lots of quizs from quizfarm.com. Got this website from wei hong's blog. Ended up doing many of them but eventually chose 3 to publish in my blog.. =)

V happy with the quiz on Which is ur Perfect Major. As mentioned by wei hong in his blog, its easy to score dance as ur major as long as u answer Strongly agree to all those qtn regarding body movements. But what i m happy abt is not tt i scored dance for my Major. Nope, take a look at my other 'scorings'. The thing i m happy abt is tt i scored ties for 4 subjects, namely Dance, Theatre, Journalism, Psychology. Eventually when u score ties, the quiz will ask u one final qtn as a tie breaker. Of course, i chose the option which i know relates to dance. Hence, in a certain way, one may argue tt i mainipulated my own results. But tt is not e issue i m concerned with. The happy thing abt this quiz is tt I m now convinced tt I haf other career options in life. =)

FYI, Frenz reading this entry, I m going to be on Attachment to companies doing Accounting work soon. After a yr plus, I will be graduating and may be stuck with Acc work once & for all. Thus, it's really comforting to know tt actually there r other options in life. (Some readers by now may think tt i m childish juz basing my thots on an online quiz) Well, someday, u all may understand the tragedy when interests do not align with occupation.

At least aft i haf done this quiz, I am VERY SURE tt my interests lies in where I thot it would be. Which means I m not avoiding Acc juz becos my grades r poor, & tt I like those subjects mentioned above not becos I do well in them, but simply becos I haf a TRUE PASSION for them. Eg. I not doing any journalism at all in Uni, but I simply love writing essays & blogging entries. The happy thing I can say to myself is tt I m glad I HAF BEEN TRUE TO MYSELF all along; I didnt blame my poor grades on any external factors, I always know what i m doing, I go DI or NHDS not becos I didnt wanna study or act 'big boss' etc.

I did all i did simply becos I have interests & passion in what i chose to do.
Sometimes as we grow up, we might tend to lie to ourselves SUB-CONSCIOUSLY maybe to cover up for our failure, save our own ego etc. I m happy today becos I confirmed tt I didnt lie to myself or escape from reality sub-consciously... The feeling is juz so true & real. =)

Attachment coming soon, will last for 10 weeks from May to July, I still dunno whether I can get thru job interviews and in addition, deliver good results on-the-job or not... All attachment programs all seem so hard to me... =( I feel helpless in this kind of situations cos like in this quiz, I once again confirmed tt actually i dun belong to the Corporate Business Industry, I m not those 'everyday in Shenton Way CBD area trying to make more $$' kind of ppl.

Accountancy.........

End of Entry

You scored as Dance. You should be a Dance major! Like a lithe ballerina, you dance because you believe there is beauty in expressing the physical form. Dance 100% Theater 100% Journalism 100% Psychology 100% Sociology 83% Philosophy 83% Engineering 75% Art 75% English 75% Mathematics 75% Anthropology 67% Linguistics 67% Biology 42% Chemistry 33% What is your Perfect Major? (PLEASE RATE ME!!<3) created with QuizFarm.com

What Mythological Creature are you? (Cool Pics!)
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Mermaid. Mermaid: Mermaids are also known as Sirens. These creatures were beautiful women who tricked sailors into becoming completely entranced by their haunting voices and found death soon after. Not all stories of Mermaids are about gentle loving sea people. They are mystical, magical, and extremely dangerous. They have a way about them that brings anyone they are around to seem enchanted. They are very mysterious creatures and to meet one... Would mean certain Death. Let the song of the Sea fill your soul, for you are a Mermaid. Mermaid 92% Angel 67% Faerie 67% Dragon 59% Demon 50% WereWolf 42% What Mythological Creature are you? (Cool Pics!) created with QuizFarm.com

What ancient breed are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Wolf. you are a wolf, the second oldest but the strongest of all ancient breeds. your quick to anger but otherwise very frindly. you would do anything for your family and friends. Wolf 92% Vampyre 92% Elf 83% Drow 83% Sorceress 75% Faerie 67% Dragon 50% Shadow Spirit 50% Godess 50% Zombie 33% What ancient breed are you? created with QuizFarm.com

Reasons to keep me ongoing in teaching DANCE

Time is Jan 2006, a yr has past since 2005, (a yr i taught at Tanglin SS), as of today I can declare tt i think i haf done a great job last yr..
Becos of commitments this yr, I can only teach on Tues & Fri at Tanglin, & becos of school politics which now involve dance instructors from other dance companies, the situation has worsened & become more complicated...

Life is not a bed of roses, yup politics exist everywhere BUT sub-consciously i once wished tt politics will not be existent in e Arena of Arts cos Arts is supposed to be driven by passion & not profit since Arts all along is NOP organisations. But of course in reality, politics still exist everywhere lah.. So the issue goes where dance instructors from other dance companies enter Tanglin SS & wish to divide the pie into more pieces, reducing DI's share into a smaller one. (Cos Mr Low not interested in these kind of political struggles, so we juz made do with the current situation lor..)

These type of reasons reminded me of what Jeff Tan said in his lectures (Dun do arts lah, be a arts consumer instead of a arts creator, Arts creators are manupilated by $$ one... Give ppl use $ to pressurize one...) So yup, actually wat Jeff said is correct, Life not a bed of roses. Arts oso have its dark side, juz like every other thing else in this world... So readers, those who wish to Do Dance as a occupation, be ready to face these ugly situations, & oso haf to be cool with it... =)

But, amidst all these unhappy & ugly things tt happen, i realize tt there is something tt give me motivation to go on (juz like what gives Jeff motivation in carrying on what he is doing, is he manage to *unplug* some students every semester.) is tt I managed to intro some students to the Dance Arena & make them haf interest in Dance.

This yr i m taking 2T1, 2N2 & 1E2. Apparently all quite rebellious classes. The motivation i haf is my last yr class 1E3 (now 2E3) now misses me so much, tt they acknowledge i m good teacher & wishes me to go back teach them on Wed.. Haha, unfortunately my class is Tues & Fri. The issue is not tt i haf a BIG ego tt my students muz say i m good. Nope, its the appreciation they show =) Once there is appreciation, at least i know someday in life, there r ppl in life whom r influenced by me in their lifetime.. This is min. sufficient for me as a motivtion to carry on in DANCE... =) Anything more than this i would jolly welcome but yup i treat it a Bonus.. They wish me to go back teach them & oso indicated tt they felt the other instructors from the other companies CMI, Haha.... Tt's y i say lah... No pt Involve in so many politics cos in e end students r still the best indicator of whether i can teach or not...

Sub-ending

*unplug*
This is a v interesting event done by Jeff Tan. What it means is thru lectures & tutorials, he managed to teach Theatre studies & release our creativity + the way we look at issues/ productions. Thru his unplug process, u will look at issues (debate issues, relationships, human behaviour, politics etc) / productions(whether dance, drama, movies etc) in a new & revolutionary way which u would nv haf thot of in life...
Yes, is nv thot of b4... Hence the term *unplug* cos the analogy he used when conducting his lectures is tt he is Neo in Matrix & his job is to unplug students from their *fixed train of thought* & unleash our creativity as well as look at things from a v diff perspective, which hence as if gives them a new life... =) Though ideally is hope to unplug all students but usually he only managed to 'save' some every semester, BUT its already enough to keep him moving on... Yup, so M I... =)

End of Entry

2006- events during Dec holidays

Well, here to record some events i enjoyed during the Dec holidays.. Basically this holiday is The one i enjoyed most for the past 3 yrs maybe?? Ever since NS? Lets start.. Firstly, there is Zhenyu's b-day celebration at Downtown East chalet. Well, i shall not elaborate much on this event cos there was an entry on this earlier. (interested parties kindly refer to earlier entries)

Next, I gained more exp in Dance instructing as i went over to Ai Tong Pri Sch at Bishan to teach for 5 days. Choreographed a SYF dance for them, introduced by Mr Low one... Next, went on to a dance company called 'Dance on Us' to teach Wushu. Then this was the one i kanna 'complained' to Mr Low, they said tt i wasnt strict enough as a instructor, wasnt able to control the little kids aged 5 to 13. Well, readers if u all know me as a dancer, i guess u all might be laughing at this 'complain' now huh?? Well, i do not wish to touch on this issue anymore cos it was an unpleasant exp anyway..

Den move on to 31 Dec, i spent the night over at Zhenyu's house, Haha i ended up reading comic books (belonging to my era, Dragon-Ball) & i enjoyed them so much tt i laughed at all those comical jokes... Michelle, on the other hand, was so surprised tt Dragon-Ball so funny meh? How come Zhongyi siao one, can laugh till like tt? She gave me a kind of 'u siao ah? or u loser leh' look... Hehe.. But its alright, i explained to her tt when u r in the adult world for too long, kiddish stuff such as comical jokes can actually brighten up my day.... It's the cute cute jokes tt really brighten up my day, make me feel better as an adult...

Now move on to today; 7 Jan 2006 NHSS CCA Extravagenza
Well, NHDS ppl managed to pull it off. I personally give credit to the exco & Wei Hong for making it a success.. NHDS managed to 'pull customers' from other CCAs, well, i believe many students are interested in Dance now as the 'marketing strategy' was a success... Si Aun, Shi Bin can make good salesperson sia... Good public speaking.. Okie, not so bad, my efforts to go there early are not wasted... =)

Okie so far for now, a simple entry to record how i spend my Dec holidays in 2005. To me, its rather eventful, many things happened....

End of Entry

My 8th Essay in 2005

Wah, shiok, v comfortable aft writing this essay, this one it took me abt 2 days in all. I started abt 3 or 4 days ago but slack ah, so strictly speaking only abt 2 days work.. Readers pls enjoy and as usual, post ur comments or even send me an email..

Next, i shall move on to the origins of my Ling Gan for this essay.. This essay is really shiok. Normal readers who wish to look out for a storyline, i m sorry u will be v disappointed. Cos my Ling Gan came from so many corners, it cant be formed into a story & i intentionally didnt wanna include a storyline, which i'll explain later why.

Origin 1: Sam's Blog song - Jay Chou's Feng (I went to check up on this song cos i liked the music melody from Sam's blog, didnt know it was a song, till some1 told me, i went to listen & check up the lyrics & wah piang, its damn nice)

Origin 2: Juncheng's Blog Wallpaper abt Sin & Forgiveness... (A really nice wallpaper, i guess its Final Fantasy wallpaper? Kinda liked the Sin & Forgiveness idea, so wanted to write something abt it...)

Origin 3: Songs by Rain - Still unfamiliar & Utada Hikaru - First Love (These 2 songs v sentimental & touching so it inspired me =))

Combine all 3 origins together & I have this essay as the final product... Hahaha... Feeling v shiok now. Now, the reason why i obmitted the storyline cos i only wanted to bring out the feelings of my origins, whoever is reading can thus feel free to put urself in the shoes of my essay & include ur own life story. In this way, u may haf a stronger sense of ownership for my essay, able to understand & feel IT in a better way... =)

So readers pls enjoy, & do leave ur comments.... =)

Feeling great now

End of Entry

无法习惯

北风无情地刮着，大地弥漫着萧索、凄凉的气息。一股莫名的寂寞凄凉浮游于空气中，我独自在百花凋谢的这个秋天走着。秋天已到，树叶簌簌飘落，落得遍地。我缓缓走着，一步步都显得沉重疲惫，脚步仿佛背负着沉重负担。而这呆滞的步伐走得无声无息，仿佛走的人亦毫无生命。渐渐地，我在一棵树下停了下来。冷风霍然吹起，遍地落叶随风飘舞，围绕著我，仿佛亦感应到了我的黯然神伤。落叶与我擦身而过，带给我一份若即若离的感觉，气氛瞬间更添凄凉。。。

原谅我，我知道即使再怎么做，都无法挽回这秋天的一切。随着秋天的结束，冬季即将降临，而我亦会独自渡过这寒冷的冬天。然而，与你的共同回忆已深深烙印在我的内心深处，我无法习惯没有你的日子，无法习惯没有你在身边的感觉。深深想念着你的味道、你的微笑、你时而沉，时而轻的呼吸。。。记忆中的你带给我无限的欢笑，犹如春天的阳光，明媚温暖，不带任何杀伤力，缓缓地溶化了冬天残留下来的冰霜。我仍无法习惯没有你的每一天，就如从前一样。在你离开的这个秋天，树叶枯萎了，我的脚步变得呆滞，我的身心交瘁、疲惫不堪，我的生命无声无息地结束了。。。

原谅我，I wish to be forgiven。此时此刻，你不在我身边；而回忆的片段不断地在我脑海里重复著。风，仍不停地刮着；叶，亦继续飘落；我的伤口也依旧没有抚平；思念还是持续不断。一阵莫名的悲伤汹涌袭来，我忽然感到肩膀湿答答的，抬头一望，原来天空已下起雨来。这一瞬间，我已无法分辨出究竟是我因悲伤而落泪，还是天为你我的故事而哭？泪水与雨水已混合在一起了。在这凄凉的秋天，这一阵冷冷的冰雨与片片的落叶让我深切地感受到失去你的‘痛’。今晚落叶簌簌下，满天繁星如我泪。。。

繁星点点，多不胜数，但每一颗星之间的距离却又那么遥远，仿佛就如你我之间的距离。背负着种种的过错，我祈求得到宽恕，即使我知道一切都无法挽回并且都会在这个秋天结束。。。

犹如这场绵绵不断、毫无终结的雨， U will always be inside my heart, I hope I have a place in your heart too.....

Dance Exchange Program @ NHSS 2005

Time is 21 Dec. Well, i didnt intend to join in or even go down to NHSS today, but becos of something i need to go down look for Mr Low and explain everything to him, so basically i went down. I do not wish to spell out everything here cos i really wish to put things behind me. As i said, my blog is a paperless collection of my memories, i wouldn't want these unhappy memories to be recalled when i read this entry again in the future. Basically its abt dance instructing stuff.

Okie, so i went down to NH today & sat there the whole day while they played games. All 4 schs were there & yup they perf items turn by turn. Then the ketchup song came & they started to party. Wah Lau, Mr Low muz haf done something to the tempo of the song. The tempo is damn fast, perhaps twice as fast? or one-half times? Next is the Countdown dance. Wah Piang, tt one can confirm is MINIMUM twice as fast. Haha, den Mr Low call us grads go down dance with them as well. It was really a shiok dance. I haf nv danced this dance with dance steps twice as fast b4, so finally got a chance to pit my personal speed with the music, Wah Piang, really shiok man!!! It was a challenge sia, i pit my speed against tt of the music, taking note of my actions, making sure i didn't 'eat' my steps in a bid to catch up with the music, eventually i put in effort & yup, managed to prove to myself TODAY tt i could still catch up with the twice as fast music.
Cos frankly speaking, long time nv dance full-up liao, & to fast music somemore. I v long nv attend Patrick's lessons, so v long no chance to come into contact with fast tempo music. So today is really to prove to myself tt i can still catch up with fast Tempo. V Happy, at least it eliminated my depression since morning.. Yup, so ended today's Exchange Prog at NH with the Countdown dance, with me joining all the students from: Crescent, Nan Chiau, Nan Hua & Tanglin, for the sake of challenging myself. & yup, glad to know tt i still Can Make It. =)

A fast dance is really tiring sia... But really challenging & Shiok!

End of Entry

Introduction & Appreciation
(Cocktail + Jay Chou's Fa Ru Xue)

Time is 10 Dec '05. Last night was Zhenyu's birthday, we celebrated it via a 3day 2 night chalet at Pasir Ris Downtown East. First night i was quite happy, introduced a drink of Baley's Irish Cream with Hershey's chocolate to everyone present tt day. They liked it alot, & I was glad, after all, it's nice to introduce to ppl (esp ladies) these drinks with low alcohol content yet tasty. Haha, esp Joanna, Ivy liked it so much, they kept asking for more.. Though Mei Fang didn't drink much, she still gave acknowledgement tt the drink was nice...

=) It's satisfying to know tt ur introduction of things to frenz are appreciated

However, last night, i didn't haf a goodnight's sleep & yup something happened in the midnight/ early morning during the chalet den i got headache till this afternoon.. Then came home to sleep this morning but headache still didnt subside.. Moreover, still need to use brain over some issues, make me even more headache..
So aft my lunch, i went to sleep again but this time i did some music therapy as i get into sleep.. Hehe, miraclously my headache subsided.. =)
So here i m to introduce this magical song to my blog readers.. Fa Ru Xue by Jay Chou

The lyrics are below, pls enjoy & feel the song, it's really unique in a certain way, very good for music therapy. As i listen to the song, i slept with full relaxation (dancers reading this, u all shld already know its v difficult to relax all muscles even in sleep), yet i managed to do it with e help of this song.. Ppl who cant get to sleep/ haf headaches, i intro this song to u.
Another song oso worth mentioning is Still Unfamiliar sung by Korean Singer - Rain. Those in the chalet should know,i played ths song on Repeat mode last night.. Yup, these 2 songs r quite good for music therapy. U all may haf ur own choices of songs as well but do try out my suggestions.. At least they worked for me =) U dun expect to play Hip Hop/ heavy groove music for music therapy right? I think will even more stressed..

Readers, thanx for reading & yup, enjoy the feel of Fa Ru Xue, appreciate the beauty of this song, from lyrics to melody etc. Music Therapy is not juz listening to music alone, FEEL & APPRECIATE it... Understand the lyrics may help.. =) Anyway diff ppl got diff ways, try them out =)



歌曲：发如雪

歌手：周杰伦 专辑：十一月的萧邦

狼牙月伊人憔悴我举杯饮尽了风雪
是谁打翻前世柜惹尘埃是非
缘字诀几番轮回你锁眉哭红颜唤不回
纵然青史已经成灰我爱不灭
繁华如三千东流水
我只取一瓢爱了解只恋你化身的蝶

你发如雪凄美了离别我焚香感动了谁
邀明月让回忆皎洁爱在月光下完美
你发如雪纷飞了眼泪我等待苍老了谁
红尘醉微醺的岁月我用无悔刻永世爱你的碑

rap:你发如雪凄美了离别我焚香感动了谁
邀明月让回忆皎洁爱在月光下完美
你发如雪纷飞了眼泪我等待苍老了谁
红尘醉微醺的岁月

啦儿啦啦儿啦啦儿啦儿啦啦儿啦啦儿啦啦儿啦儿啦
铜镜映无邪扎马尾你若撒野今生我把酒奉陪

End of Entry

散文 <<瞬间の永恒 - 序>>

永恒不是永远。有人常常把永远与永恒搞错。永远与时间有关联。永远是用于指时间的长久性。永恒却和时间没有关联。它原是指不变的东西，因此有“永恒不变”的成语。它着重于不变的那种特质。所以才有这样的说法：钻石是永恒的。因为钻石不会变质，也不会因岁月的蹉跎的变形。
相对的，永远是因时间而定形的。例如：“你会爱我多久？”， “我会永远爱你。” 在这里，时间必须有存在的意义，那么永远才会有其宝贵的价值。永恒却不为此所影响。

永恒是和不变有关联，而永远是和时间的长久性有关联。

搞清楚了两者之间的差别，这篇散文的主题就不会矛盾了。因为瞬间与时间有关联，是指一霎那间的意思。而永远却是指长久的意思。因此，将主题读成瞬间の永远，不免自相矛盾，甚至不能理解作者最想表达的情感。但是，若将主题读成瞬间の永恒，就不难理解作者的用意。那代表着瞬间的不变。亦就是说瞬间的所有：包括了景象、天气、面貌、情感、承诺、回忆等都不会变。这些东西都会历经时间的洗礼，却仍然保持不变。其中，瞬间亦表示了“少”的可贵。

其意境与这两句话有点相似之处
“不在乎天长地久，只在乎曾经拥有”
和
“曾经沧海难为水，除却巫山不是云”

瞬间の永恒

在不知名的远处，有着一栋房子。在这偏僻、毫无人烟的地方，根本没有人会注意甚至经过这栋房子，也从来没有人开启这房子的那扇门。不知过了多久,这间房子来了一位房客。她，什么行李也没带，就打算这么住下来。她轻轻地打开了这扇许久没被开启的门，一步一步踏进了这间房子。她试着探索这房子的神秘，到处摸索，在房子处处留下了脚印。初次住进这间不甚熟悉的房子，她却备感温馨，感到房子给她一种很贴心的亲密感。虽不知她会何时搬走，但她却已在这间房子留下了不可磨灭的脚印。。。。

某年某月某一天的晚上，在送她回家的路途中，他们坐在寥寥数人的车里，窗外一片寂静。路上不见川流不息的车子，只见一排一排的街灯。车的行驶速度并不缓慢，却不知为何，车子似乎永远不会到达终点。他们紧握着彼此的手，依偎在一起，享受着爱就在身边的感觉。尽管车还是以急速在路上奔驰，他还是希望这段路程永远不要结束。与她在一起时的感觉独一无二，非其他人可取代。

他孤高冷傲，从来就没有人能接近他，更没有人试着要打开他心中的那扇门。这扇通往他心房的门被紧紧地锁上了。而从来就没有人能打开这把心锁，她不知如何竟持有打开这道门的钥匙。亦唯有她，才能打开这扇门，借而通往他的内心世界，探索他的心灵深处。。。
在这里，她或许不会住得很久，但是却已在他的心田里留下了不可磨灭的脚印。这一步一步的回忆已足以陪伴他一生一世。。。

当她将手放入他的手里时，她的玉指恰恰填满了他手指间的指缝，仿佛就如她住进了他的心房，填满了他心中的空虚。她的手不仅握住了他的手，仿佛亦触碰到了他的内心深处。握着她柔软的手时，他深切地感受到她的心，仿佛紧握的双手已将两颗心连接在一起，竟连心跳与呼吸的旋律都一致。这一瞬间的所有已代表了永恒。。。

犹如流星划过天际，最灿烂的一刻已是瞬间的永恒。即使流星已不在，观星者依旧记得它在无边无际的黑夜长空所留下的色彩。她亦同样地在他心中留下了永不磨灭的回忆。。。。

一瞬间已足够。。。

散文 <<冰天雪地 - 心的接触>>

这篇文章稍嫌短了一点，所以决定把它定为一篇散文。这篇散文以冰、雪、心为主题，其中概括阳光与黑暗的关系以及时间的流逝与停顿。或许慢工出细伙，这篇散文我花了五个小时来完成，比起以往作品不知是否稍微逊色？但是，这部作品依旧是我有感而发，所以事先没做太多准备功夫，一切纯属即兴。灵感来自陈晓东的一首粤语歌曲：心的接触

希望读者会喜欢，欢迎你发表你的感想。。。。

冰天雪地 - 心的接触

在这个地方，仿佛天天都是冬天。寒冷的风无情地刮着，大地没有丝毫生气，处处弥漫着一种近乎死亡的气息。一切都停顿、似乎连时间与空间都冻结，仿佛连地球都停止转动。这片大地没有一丝阳光，存在的只是一片黑暗。既没有白天也没有夜晚；在这里，时间失去了它的意义。年、月、日、分、秒，都没有任何分别。在这一片毫无生气的大地，存在着一座冰窟，冰窟的深处存放着一样东西。这样东西被万年玄冰冰封着，摆放在冰窟里也不知过了多久，一切似乎对时光的流逝无动于衷。。。

他们在一个不知名的情形下邂逅了彼此。当她初次出现在他的生命中时，一切如往常。但是，却不知从何时起，她的情绪开始影响了他。她的喜怒哀乐成了他最在乎的事。这时，大地有了变化，漫长的冬季告一段落。寒冷的风不再无情地刮着，取而代之的是一阵清凉爽朗的微风。时间与空间已不再冻结，黑暗的天空中渐渐地露出一丝丝的曙光，为大地带来了温暖。黑夜与白昼轮流交替，时间有了其存在的意义。大地逐渐因阳光的温暖而变得生气勃勃。冰天雪地渐渐融化，冰窟崩塌了，万年玄冰亦融化了，露出了一颗血红的心。血红的心开始在这一片冰天雪地中跳动，每一个心跳都仿佛震动了大地，驱散了死亡的气息。冰封已久的心因她的关系而解冻，只因不知从何时起，她的一颦一笑在他心中激起了阵阵涟漪。。。。

在一起的时候，感觉十分奇妙，这份感觉很亲近、很贴心。心与心的接触很真实，她是否也感觉得到？和她心连心的接触，改写了他的结局，终止了那漫长的冬天，更为大地注入了灵魂、情感，使他不再是无情的一副躯壳。她为他带来的不仅仅是爱情，而是更多尽在不言中的情感。冰窟已不复在，玄冰也不再凝结，心亦不再被冰封起来。。。

手牵手，心连心，一起走向未知的明天已是幸福。不知这条路会通往何处，不知能携手一起走多久，只知现在拥有的一切已是幸福。结局如何，他们都不知道，抑或根本不想知道，甚至情愿不知道，只想此刻在一起，过着心与心紧紧相连的日子。。。

此时正是四月份，外头却不知缘故，竟然漫天飞雪；片片雪花随风飘落，毫不着力地落在他的肩上，瞬间融化了，只因她为他带来温暖，使那颗跳动的心不再冻结。。。。

<<窗外雨滴-序>> <Raindrop>

Well, another essay done.. This essay took relatively a shorter time. Basically it took me simply one whole afternoon & i managed to complete it. It may not be v well-done but i haf a sense of accomplishment becos this essay was done impromptu, w/o much planning unlike previous essays.
This essay, i got my ling gan from 2 songs; A song for Lady by H.O.T, Wu Jin De Si Nian by Lin JJ. However, the main theme of this essay came from the rain today. It's been raining from this morning till now, so i m here at home nursing my injury, den nothing else to do, hence came up with an essay. =)

Unlike my previous essays, this particular essay has no story line to follow, yah there is but readers may find some pieces of the 'jigsaw puzzle' missing, so u may find tt the changes in the essay r abrupt & not smooth... Hehe, well, its alright cos i only wanted to express some thoughts i haf w.r.t to the 2 songs mentioned above & the rain today. =) I suggest u play these two songs while reading my essay, u may haf a diff feel. Best if when u look out of the window, its raining at the same time when u r reading...

A simple piece of essay, readers feel free to give comments... As usual, i wont get offended, dun worry...

End of Entry

<<窗外雨滴>>

夕 阳西下，阳 光缓缓地从地平线上消失。。。清澈的海水因为失去了阳光的反射，不再耀眼。夜幕低垂，海洋仿佛换上了另一件晚装，营 造了另一种气氛。我独自走 在沙滩上，迎面吹着海风。如此漫无目的地走着，听着海涛击打在岩石上的声音，看着海面上溅起的浪花，时间就在不知不觉中悄悄溜走了。时间总是如此这般在人 类的不知觉中溜走。。。爱情亦是一样。时间是永恒的，对于时间的无情，它的毫不停留，人类处于被动，毫无反抗的处境，一切是那么地无可奈何。面对永恒的时 间，人类显得多么渺小。

她是我一生挚爱，我们的爱情经过很多考验，彼此之间的爱情却始终坚贞不移。但是即使多么纯洁的爱情，也敌不过命运 的摆布。仿佛在扮演着悲剧中的角色似的， 她的身体逐渐衰弱，但在医学上却找不出任何解释。日子一天一天过去了，时间无情地流逝，她变得越来越憔悴。被病魔缠身的她却依然故作坚强，强颜欢笑，不希 望身边的人为她伤心难过。在看似坚强的微笑背后，隐藏着深深的悲痛。我明明知道，也感觉得到，却无力挽回她的笑容。在笑容逐渐褪去的时光中，她的生命也燃 烧到了尽头。。。

纯 洁的白玫瑰枯萎、凋谢了，我的世界停留在一年前的那一霎那，一切冻结了。。。尽管地球还是继续转动，日子也依旧一天一天过去，我却犹如行尸走肉一般，毫无 情感。“对不起，Dear,我虽答应了你不再流泪，但无奈对你的思念还是没减少，而失去你的痛还依旧残留在心中，深深被埋藏在内心的某一个角落，我还是无 法忘怀。。。”

此 时，面对着窗外的绵绵细雨，我不禁想起我们曾经一起走过的路，所踏过的每一片草原。雨点绵绵不绝地击打在窗上；滴答、滴 答、滴答~~~ 雨点在透明的玻璃窗缓缓滑落，仿佛形成了一幅画。画中的那名女生多愁善；她虽然拥有雪白的肌肤，脸上却蒙上了一层忧郁，使她显得越加苍白。那一滴一滴的 雨点仿佛是从她眼中滑落的泪水，颗颗晶莹剔透的泪珠显得纯洁无垢，似乎象征着她真情的流露。。。她是因相思、分离之苦而流泪吗？我试图抚摸她的脸颊，感受 那令人温馨的体温，无奈触碰到的尽是冰冷的玻璃窗。我的心又再次沉淀到深海里，对她的无尽思念这辈子都不会减少。我们之间的距离也不会丝毫缩短。我 知道自己曾经答应她不会沉溺于 悲伤。而能让我见到她的唯一方法是透过雨天、透过那片冰冷的玻璃窗；亦只有每当下雨天，我才能再次见到她。即使如此，我们之间的距离还是让我触摸不到 她。。。

“能与你相爱一次，这一生我已满足。对你的种种思念，我将会把它埋藏在心里，让悲伤不再。” 能够慰藉这颗冰冻的心亦只有下雨天的雨点、只有你。。。

Thoughts & Feelings aft Lao Jiu The Musical 2005

Well, much haf been said abt this production, i haf gone thru alot, including one additional new injury inflicted by my fellow dancer. I shall touch on issue by issue in this entry. Honestly, the moment i got this injury, which i demmed serious, i was v sad, v v sad..
1stly, sad tt i cant practise dance 4 approx 2 months, 2nd, its the issue i wanna bring up in this entry.

With utmost respect to all readers & my frenz reading this entry, dun misunderstand my words. U all should know me well so i shall not think abt 'phrasing'... I'll juz pour out my thots w/o packaging them, pls understand..

The issue is I m injured by my fellow dancer, Mr Low's student. I wanna say why all of us r taught by the same teacher, turned out so differently? I dun consider myself a talent, hence i expect others to hit the same level as me easily, or even surpass me... There is room for improvement for me..
I m so sad is tt why r the students from Mr Low's classes getting more & more CMI? The truth y i was injured is really simply becos he couldn't grasp his amt of strength & his timing & positioning... Isn't a 'Mr-Low-trained' dancer supposed to know all these already? I dun blame him for this becos even Jet Li Jackie Chan in movies they slipped too, & injure too..
Hence, i m not asserting blame, i m simply sad...
I m sad becos the students who r being churned out of Mr Low's hands r getting more & more CMI. Yet, this isn't Mr Low's fault, i saw how he taught these students. Basically he taught me the same things when i was a student, but why did i turn out like tt, & those ppl turn out otherwise?

I m not advocating tt every1 muz be like me, muz be the same... NO!!! I m saying why these basic principles such as timing & positioning r not taken into account when they dance/ perform? I dare to say here, in my blog, tt all the current Sec 3s of NHDS oso make this type of mistake, they r juz pure lucky they didnt injure otheres yet... In a performance, like i always teach them as well, u muz be sensitive to what is going on ard u, u dun juz F***ing dance ur own dance steps & dun bother abt other things.. It doesn't work this way, it isn't supposed to as well... All these advice fell on deaf ears...

Hence i m so sad, which is y i blogged down this entry. Cant they be more careful, more enthu, more hardworking to improve themselves? I m sad becos If this carries on, i wouldnt dare & wouldnt want to dance with any of the dancers in DI liao, cos they jeopardize my life leh...
F***, this time is ribcage already damn serious liao, next time is what?

So the sadness continues, cos if i dun dance with them, i haf to part with my beloved dance... I really dun wish to.. But it doesnt mean i haf to compromise & accomodate these sub-standard ppl who will endanger my life-span in dancing... I wanna carry on dancing 4 a long term, i really wish to, the only possible way is tt they muz buck up...... Not i bring myself to tt kind of level to join them...

Argh................................... Why muz things turn out like tt?

End of Entry (with sadness)

Dance Exp in Events so far (from 1996 - 2005)
Edited version since 21 Nov '05

Blogged this entry so tt in future i can easily recall what i did during my younger dayz...
Realize my memories r failing me recently..
If u realize tt is the reason y i suddenly chose to blog...
A paperless collection of my memories...

1996 - NDP Mass Display
1997 - SYF Dance Competition Joyful Harvest(Gold)
1997 Dec to 1998 Jan - My 1st self-choreographed dance under guidance of Mr Low (my idea was later adopted & edited by Mr Low for 1998's D.I. production Snake Dance) Titled: Zhan Wu Bu Sheng
1998 - SYF Mass Display at Kallang Stadium
1998 - Hope, Vannessa Mae dance (e table & chou)
1999 - SYF Dance Competition, Forging Ahead (Gold)
1999 - Suntec Millenium Countdown (at top of Fountain, circle road) - Forging Ahead
2000 - Kallang Theatre, He Wu Gong Ming 2000 - The world in the Magical Box *w Guang Ming + Han Qiang etc
2000 - NKF event at e water area opp Istana Park - 30+ min dance (comprieses of: my very 1st self-choreographed solo dance under the guidance of Mr Low, Titled: Pan Gu (duration 10 min) + The world in the Magical Box (editied version, 15 min) , + Hope)

2000? - I think.... Chingay at Nicoll Highway
2001 - Quit 4 'A' Levels
2002 - Go back NHSS help the Chingay at Padang
2003 - Aft Commission, later half of the yr go back join Mr Low
2004 - NKF event at e water area opp Istana Park - The world in the Magical Box (diff from 2000, is this time no stage, straight away dance in water) Path Productions
2004 - Wu Ju 3 (collaboration w Foo Chow Assoc) Kopitiam + Bottle up
2005 - Chingay 2005 @ Orchard Road
2005 - NDP 2005 @ Padang
2005 - Lao Jiu The Musical 2005 presented by TTP

Out of the list unmentioned are minor performances such as Cultural Pot & Sch Anniversary + Comm Centre perf....


Partners i have cooperated with thru out the years:
1996 - Xueping
1998 - Lee Hao Yih, Chuiling, ZhiQian, Cai Shiming, Jingling
1999 - Connie Wan Ziying
2000 - Zhou Xiu, Hui Ting, QianHui, Xiao Huimin, Xiao Wanling
2003 - Xue Zhen
2004 - Shi Hui, Adelene Kong, Wei Yun, Yunyun

So far from 1996 - 2005 is lidat... (edited since 21 Nov '05)

Some dance memories:
*2002 Dec i went NHSS @old sch campus NHPS for e dance camp, is last time i saw Mdm See still as a teacher in NHSS....
*smth worth mentioning abt yr 2000 NKF event: Last chance 4 3 of us dance together Weiyang, me & Zixiang.. Weiyang nv dance since then...