Enlightened

Event recollection: Prac 4 NKF Cancer fund Perf which is due on 3rd July

This entry is to remind myself of the 'dangerous' times i haf gone thru, almost killing my own dance path... Serves as a reminder nv to do these things again, cos juz simply it is 'dangerous', can cause lots of misunderstandings... Ever since i re-joined D.I in 2003, everything was wonderful...

Until this new batch of youngsters, those so much younger than me... So dunno is they too comfortable in their own sch or i m too harsh, but anyway, they come into DI, with the usual slack attitude they haf in their sch, regardless which sec sch under Mr Low, they all seemingly adopt the same 'training attitude': tt means know the dance steps can liao, nv go into depth to analyze the dance steps, & even be strict abt it.. I not even mentioning understand & feel the dance or whatsoever, i purely talking abt accuracy & strictness of dance steps..
So apparently, when i started to correct them & be strict abt it, as usual, it caused lots of unhappiness.. As usual lah, unless the ppl r mature enough to understand y i m doing it, the response is always negative one... So they really dun understand until kanna scolded by Mr Low or wat, then wake up... Sianz, i do all the correcting & strictness b4 hand is simply becos i dun want them 2 get scolded by Mr Low mah, later not only will spoil their day, oso will spoil every1's day in DI...
Becos really mah, no students want to c Mr Low angry one, the atmosphere/ mood will all be spoilt... Y cant every1 juz dance happily in DI? Then Mr Low & every1 oso happy happy, good day 4 every1...

In our everyday life, sch/work has already so much stress & unhappiness liao, so much politics/ back stabbing etc... Come dance only to relax & so-called escape from the ugly reality world, recharge myself then go back to face the ugly reality world... Such a wish oso cant be fulfilled ah... Sianz...

K, back to topic, so i do alot of things (not only correcting dance steps, oso in correcting choreography, ice-break betw Tanglin SS & Crescent etc), so caused lots of unhappiness.. But i dun care abt those immature feelings one mah...
What i stunned is I nearly killed myself, cos in an effort to help, I thought maybe Mr Low think I bothered too much, so like too much in control... I sort of sensed it sometime ago & backed off a little (as in i knew their dance steps wrong but oso dun correct too much liao, say 1-2 times, dun listen ok then dun force u liao) dun later Mr Low angry with me... Cos i know i do things v pushy & expect an acceptable standard at least, so i oso v scared tt i do things too much, Mr Low may misunderstand i trying to take over the position as a choreographer...
So i backed off alot, didnt wanna cause misunderstanding...

Finally today, we had dinner together & we talked abt some issues over dinner, then he told me what he was planning... Wah, i was so surprized & impressed by Mr Low...
Content was smth like this: He didnt want me to interfere at all is becos he wanted to train the youngsters.. He didnt appt me do anything at all, not even expect me to do anything at all is becos he know tt i'll know how to do those things liao, (regardless whether admin/dance choreography/leadership/helping out in dao ju etc)
So i had the wrong impression (over-sensitive on my part) tt i thought i was too in control of things, & i offended Mr Low unknowingly... So actually NO lah... Is he wanna train the students, put them thru hardship as a test, so tt they can grow up & be better skilled (whether admin/dance choreography/leadership etc)

So the bottomline is, since i been thru this 'dangerous' phase, tt i thot i nearly offended Mr Low & killed my own dance path, i now know tt He is putting the new youngsters thru a so-called unannounced training prog, 4 them to grow up...
So as of today, I'll nv interfere anymore, not even in the least bit, let the youngsters grow themselves... I'll only assist if they approach me on their own will... I.E. pull factor kind of teaching instead of push factor...

Haha... Phew!!!! so relieved tt i was enlightened by Mr Low, i thot i offended him unknowingly...
Actually is his good intention not to let me interfere cos he know i'll finish the job on my own, which he doesn't want the case to be, cos he wants the new youngsters to try out so tt they can learn....

So Yeah!!! New batches & future batches to come, pls be mature.. Understand Mr Low's kind intentions, He is really a good instructor, want u all to learn so tt u can depend on urself next time... So pls, be grateful when u r tasked in future to do smth... It's a form of training, at least he took e effort to train u.. Some other instructors may juz treat u as a normal dancer & dun bother to train u in other areas...

So relieved tt i m enlightened...
Haha, from today onwards, I shall step back & take a seat liao.... At least i now know tt my interference is not needed is not becoz i did things e wrong way or wat, is juz simply Mr Low's plan of training the youngsters... =) Jia you ba, all the youths!!!

Relieved...